Sporks

Random utensil. Is it a fork or a spoon? Either way it works great to gouge out eyes. Which is what I want to do right now. With a spork.

This one is metal. Which I think would endure lot of eye gouging. I kinda want a pretty colored one...

Either way, metal or plastic, grey or purple, it would relieve my anxiety. So if i have a spork in hand, avoid eye contact and back away slowly.