Being the Nice Person

      Here is a question for anyone reading this. When are you being too nice?

     Being the nice person who does just about anything for people has always been how I am. I will go through mental anguish, depression and even abuse for those that I love simply so they can be at peace. When is enough, enough though?

       

    

     This has been a question I struggled with for a while now with my past two relationships. I know where I have wanted to be in life by now but I let them drag me down. From paying the majority of the bills, to signing leases when I wasn't even staying there, to loaning out my car. I was even the chauffer. Yes I loved these individuals, I saw potential in them. What I couldn't do though was make them live up to their potential.

     I also noticed that when I started standing up and saying no, things got ugly. Instead of being silent about the idiotic things they complained about and agreeing with them, I started actually voicing my opinion. That is when things went downhill. Things I am still having to deal with.

             

     On one hand one relationship ended badly. What did he do? He moped around for a while, broken hearted. However, he decided to be a man and move on. We may not speak, but he does acknowledge both of our faults. He understands that sometimes things just don't work out. He's moving on. No spite. No vindictive behaviors. He is the adult that realizes he can move on and this wasn't meant to be. I give him a whole LOT of respect for that. Respect he deserves when it comes to this.

    Then we have the extreme and spiteful. No matter what I may have done to help, I'm now still the bad guy. Oh lawd have mercy, I'm the psycho ex. ( Sorry, I can't help but get a good laugh at that one. This is where we need a sarcasm font. ) I'm not going to go into details about this one quite yet. There is still a lot going on that I will update everyone about in the future. I will say this though. Trying to ruin someone's new relationship is some middle school level shit. (Luckily my new boyfriend wasn't phased at all, Didn't even open the message he was sent. He just calmly came to me about the situation and has been there through the whole thing.) Getting ahold of people close to me to rant and rave about my issues (LOL "my issues") and also threatening them was a bit on the "ching-chong-potato" spectrum. It's funny though. While he's telling all these things about me, I'm hearing the things I didn't know about. (there are stories about a Rachel and Liz, and I still remember Katrina. Like seriously? And I'M the liar). This was the guy that I have done the most for. I even put my own freedom on the line for this guy. This was the guy I had put all my trust in. Now I regret everything about that relationship except one thing. When he tried to royally fuck me over I realized when enough is enough.

                  

I will never again put more into a relationship than what I get out. This goes for any relationship. Professional, friendship and romantic relationship. When you notice this happening, that is when you say "Enough"!

Sorry this kinda turned into a rant.

You get my point.

Say no.

-B